常远新托福写作真经----2012年09月15日北美真题及范文

Introduction

思路拓展改写题目→模板式套话→引出中心论点：我认为教师和学生都应该参与对老师的教学评估

模板式套话

This is a complex issue.

破题

In regard to the evaluation of teachers and theirperformance,some believe that they should be evaluated by other teachers,while others think they should be judged by their students.

如果开头实在不知道如何展开，可以简单地复述题目。

中心论点

I believe that a teacher should be evaluated by both teachers andstudents. In my opinion, only in this way can a teacher be judgedfairly.

习惯了一边倒的论证，本文带给大家另一种段落展开方式，即结合两种说法和观点。

Essay Body

Paragraph 1

思路拓展本段论点：只由学生参与评估会产生问题→解释本段论点→总结

本段论点

To begin with, I do not agree that teachers should be rated bytheir students alone, as this is incredibly problematic.

解释论点

Students are likely to judge teachers by how well they like ordislike that teacher and not necessarily on the quality of theirlessons. If a male teacher is very handsome, or a female teacheris very beautiful, they may receive higher scores from students ofthe opposite sex. If a teacher doesn’t give homework, or allows hisor her students to watch movies in class, then they may receivehigher marks than they deserve.

结论

This is especially true of teenagers in secondary school.

为了避免例子以偏概全，可以加这么一句话，这样显得很全面。

Paragraph 2

思路拓展本段论点：只让其他教师来给某个教师做评估也有失公允→解释论点：为什么有失公允→举例：我的一个历史老师的遭遇→总结

本段论点

On the other hand, it would also be a mistake to allow onlyteachers to judge other teachers on their performance.

解释论点

Since other teachers are also workmates, competition betweenworkmates is inevitable, which might result in biased judgment.

举例

One of my history professors is very knowledgeable, with a goodreputation among students for his expertise in history. However, hewas not welcomed by other professors in the history departmentdue to the jealousy of other teachers.

结论

As you can imagine, competition between teachers mightresult in negative feelings such as hatred, envy, and suspicion.Therefore, teachers might not always judge other teachers’performances fairly.

仅由老师之间互相评估会有什么问题。

Conclusion

思路拓展重申原因：两种评价各有问题→因此评价要结合两者

重申原因

In regard to teacher evaluation, there are manycomplexities andinherent(内在的，固有的) problems.

结论

The best way to assess the actual quality of instruction would beto measure teachers’ reviews of their peers, the students’ reviewsof their instructors, and finally to take into account all the examscores of the students. Rating teachers’ performance is a complexissue. Including both other teachers’ and students’ evaluationswould be a good step in evaluating teachersfairly.