同学你好,该知识点来自沪江网校《2025年11月CATTI笔译二级【签约班】》的课程,想要更系统的学习,欢迎进入课程学习。不仅可以和更多的同学一起学习,而且还有老师、助教随时的学习指导和知识点解答哦。
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同学的译文在信息传递上基本准确,但在术语精准性、语法严谨性、句式流畅度和学术书面语规范上,与二级笔译的要求存在一些差距。二级笔译要求译文不仅忠实于原文,还要在表达上符合目标语的书面习惯,做到专业、严谨、自然。
1. 原译:Sports for disabled people appear rich and colorful characteristics.
语法错误:“appear rich and colorful characteristics” 是典型的中式英语,“appear” 后不能直接接名词短语作表语,且 “characteristics” 在此处冗余。
术语表达:正式书面语中,“disabled people” 更推荐使用 “people with disabilities” 以体现包容性和专业度。
选词问题:“rich and colorful” 虽然字面对应,但书面语中用 “rich and diverse” 更能体现活动的多样性。
优化译文
Sports activities for people with disabilities are rich and diverse.
2. 原译:Primary physical rehabilitation and fitness activities among urban and rural areas carry out lively and suit to the local features.
语法错误:“carry out lively” 逻辑主语错误,活动应是 “被开展”,需用被动语态;“suit to” 是错误搭配,正确表达为 “be tailored to” 或 “be adapted to”。
术语错误:“Primary” 完全错误,“基层” 在笔译中应译为 “grassroots” 或 “community-level”;“among urban and rural areas” 表达模糊,应明确为 “in urban and rural areas”。
选词不当:“lively” 偏口语化,书面语中用 “actively” 或 “vibrantly” 更贴合语境。
优化译文
Grassroots physical rehabilitation and fitness activities for people with disabilities in urban and rural areas are being actively carried out in a manner tailored to local conditions.
3. 原译:The disabled participant rate of community cultural and sport activities nationwide has continuously risen to 23.9% in 2021 from 6.8% 2015.
表达不地道:“The disabled participant rate” 不符合英文统计术语的表达习惯,正确结构应为 “the participation rate of people with disabilities”。
语法疏漏:年份前缺少介词 “in”,应为 “in 2015”。
用词细节:“sport” 作为泛指时需用复数形式 “sports”;“continuously risen” 在书面语中可替换为更专业的 “steadily increased”。
优化译文
Nationwide, the participation rate of people with disabilities in community cultural and sports activities has steadily increased from 6.8% in 2015 to 23.9% in 2021.
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